It seems that I have often been a maverick throughout my life, both in terms of what was expected of people in general, and women in particular.

The Holstee Manifesto

For instance, I bought my own home at the age of 26 – in the late 70s that was most unusual as a single woman (especially in the suburbs of NY). I also blazed the trail in taking positions at AMTRAK that were traditionally filled by men. I chose to not have children… Drove across country by myself to relocate… Started my own business so I wouldn’t have to be in an unfulfilling, bureaucratic j-o-b… Married for the first time close to age 50… On and on the list goes.

I took an active role in creating, to the best of my ability, the life I wanted to have, believing it was possible to do so. After all, it’s my life! As I’ve aged, I’ve grown even less concerned about what others think of me (it’s none of my business anyway!); I’m taking better care of my body, mind, and spirit; and, I’ve embraced that, with Spirit, I truly do have the ability to change and to enjoy a rich life in a heaven while on earth. My path has been filled with effort on my part, and, no doubt, grace.

A recent reading made me think again about the road I’ve traveled…

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A few days ago there was a massive jackpot that had folks going crazy buying tickets. My friend Jaseem, whose father owns our little neighborhood newsstand and who is studying psychology in college, tells me, “Buying a ticket is hope-affirming. It makes people think that they could wake up in the morning to find their lives completely changed.”

Except aren’t we already supposed to be doing what we really want with our lives? I have nothing at all against people playing lotto. I caught my mother at it once, which, if you knew my mother, would have surprised you too. When I teasingly confronted her, she said that if she won the jackpot she would give it all to her church for programs to help the poor. That was Mom.

For me, at least, hope is the product of faith. I pray that I wake up every morning, thinking that my life could be changed not by a random number or lucky hunch but by the grace of God.

Father, with You nothing is a gamble; nothing happens to us by chance. Faith is the surest bet I know. Please help me live fully the life You have planned for me.

Edward Grinnan
Daily Guideposts
November 12, 2014